Matt Hazard

…a healthy dose of shenanigans to get the day rolling

Relationships and Turmoil, Uncategorized Randomness

Goodbye, Old Friend

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August 2, 2025

We’ve had a lot of good times together. Seventeen full years, plus a little extra. Words aren’t enough to express the happiness you’ve brought me through our friendship. Rest in peace, old friend. Until we meet again. You were, and always will be, a good boy.
Continue reading →: Goodbye, Old Friend
Rants and Observational Humour, Relationships and Turmoil

Marriage – Love and Warfare

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July 23, 2025

Where I have little doubt that marriage is absolutely a confession of love for your partner until the end of time (as the promise goes), it is also no doubt the beginning of a lifelong war. The stakes? Your sanity. The reward? That blissful sheen of sweat upon your brow…
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Relationships and Turmoil

“Sole Mate” – Starting off on the Wrong Foot

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July 16, 2025

Just like when Morpheus first met Neo, I knew that my wife would be the One. I didn’t need an Oracle to tell me she was about to crash my system and rebuild my world, even if it is slightly in her image. We started off doing all the things…
Continue reading →: “Sole Mate” – Starting off on the Wrong Foot
Blood, Sweat, Tears (Fitness), Day to Day Shenanigans (Life)

“Don’t Think. Feeeeeeel.”

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July 1, 2025

I grew up watching martial arts movies, from Ninja Turtles all the way through the Mortal Kombat instalments. I was obsessed. We even had a trampoline that I’d practice backflips and other tricks as a youth, just in case I needed such skills to navigate the mean hallways of my…
Continue reading →: “Don’t Think. Feeeeeeel.”
Uncategorized Randomness

Kumquat – The Fruit You Didn’t Know You Needed

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March 30, 2025

When my wife came home from the grocery store and told me she had brought home a container of kumquats, I did what any other uncultured guy would do – I chuckled. After getting the stink eye, I asked her again what it was she brought home, and if she…
Continue reading →: Kumquat – The Fruit You Didn’t Know You Needed
Day to Day Shenanigans (Life), Relationships and Turmoil

A Fork in the Road

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March 20, 2025

Life experiences can really be boiled down to a series of choices. Often we feel like we are exactly on track – where we ought to be. And sometimes the Lord puts a fork in the road that can shape who we are. Chicken or beef? A common question asked…
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Day to Day Shenanigans (Life)

How Binge Drinking is Saving My Health

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March 16, 2025

Yeah. You read that correctly. And I agree, when you say it out loud the words echo insanity, but hear me out. The Backstory Growing up, liquor was always my ‘bad habit’. I didn’t smoke, I wasn’t into drugs, and I was way too nerdy to be out causing a…
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Relationships and Turmoil

Honesty Isn’t Always The Best Policy

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February 19, 2025

Being able to make my wife laugh on a daily basis is one of the best qualities in our marriage. And sometimes, just because she finds it funny, I’ll tell her stories of my youth that are embarrassing. We were upstairs in the kitchen after dinner, and she had just…
Continue reading →: Honesty Isn’t Always The Best Policy
Rants and Observational Humour

No, Mom, The Windchill is NOT the Actual Temperature

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February 2, 2025

Ask a Canadian, “What’s the winter like up there?” and they’ll probably respond with something like “If Hell froze over, it wouldn’t be as bad as this.” For perspective, it’s not uncommon for parts of Canada to be measurably colder than the surface of Mars. Unfortunately for me, I live…
Continue reading →: No, Mom, The Windchill is NOT the Actual Temperature
Day to Day Shenanigans (Life)

How Pavlovian Training Ruined My Dogs

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January 26, 2025

Have you ever been around a child that accidently learned a bad word from frustrated parents? Odds are you have. In my case, I was that child. Sure, it can be hilarious for the first five minutes, but if you’re the parent you’ll come to realize that you may have…
Continue reading →: How Pavlovian Training Ruined My Dogs

Hi!

I’m Matt

Welcome to my chaotic corner of the internet, where all my inner thoughts that I’m too afraid to say aloud can seep out of my fingertips for your enjoyment. Join me on a journey through a comedic lens, touching on everything from relationships to the otherwise mundane. Nothing is off limits. Let’s get weird.

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