Matt Hazard

When my wife came home from the grocery store and told me she had brought home a container of kumquats, I did what any other uncultured guy would do – I chuckled. After getting the stink eye, I asked her again what it was she brought home, and if she could, to spell it out for me.

My inner child giggled again.

First off, let’s address the name. Apparently it was borrowed from the Cantonese gām gwāt, which translates to ‘golden orange’. So why the butchered English then? I’ve been told it’s actually Australian English if that helps paint a word picture.

These little fruit buttons look like oranges the size of golf balls, and have a peculiar taste comparable to orange peels. And I say peculiar, because somehow it’s not a bad thing. It’s hard to explain…it just the magic of kumquats.

Need a little vitamin C boost? Kumquats have you covered. In fact, vitamin C is to kumquats like misinformation is to Musk’s twitter account – loaded!

The versatility is near endless. Turn them into a marmalade. Slice ’em up and jar them with vodka for a nice citrus infused booze option the next time you’re feeling fancy.

I’m not an elegant man, I prefer the au naturel method – raw and unpeeled. The only real roadblock that can come between you and your potential new kumquat obsession is their availability. Depending on where you live geographically, odds are that the stores in your area don’t stock them at the same rate as they do apples or bananas – if at all.

My wife has set a monthly goal to fill the fruit basket with a wide variety to hit health goals. For her it’s a focus on overall health, but for me it’s the surprise of finding new bright exotic objects that I’ve never seen before on grocery day. Persimmons, passion fruit, açaí, and now kumquats.

Enough of the technicalities. At the end of the day it’s just a really fun word to say. So, the next time you’re at the grocery store and they ask you at the register “Did you find everything you needed today”, proudly raise a finger in the air and proclaim, “Point me to your finest kumquats, please!”